Summary
Chicken 16/20
Sides 8/10
Service 7/10
Magic 10/10
Total 41/50
The story
The people of South-Eastern Sydney have been clamouring to get my views on their favourite mall based fine dining establishment for a while now. With a free damp Friday afternoon on my hands, I made the most of a brief break in the weather to pony on down to the mall and to put the people out of their misery of expectation.
I’m not a shopping mall person and I’ll admit to a fair measure of reluctance at pulling up to the door. My first visit to East Garden started bizarrely as I walked past a shop window beside the door that was chocka block with puppies. Positioned there like Cerberus guarding the gates of hell I was half inclined to turn on my heel and leave. Obviously, I didn’t, but still, pretty dreadful stuff.
After crossing the depressing threshold, I made my way down into the building which spiralled ever downward like some sort of modern catacomb. Slightly bewildered, I passed such suburban shopping mall stalwarts as Johnny Biggs clothing store for the robust gentleman, the Reject Shop, and Fone Express, to a hole in the wall that shone through the darkness with the three florescent red and white letters that we love so well.
The order
Amateur dramatics concluded, I ordered an Ultimate Box for $11.45. In this bad boy is an original recipe burger (no mayo), a piece of original recipe chicken, a potato and gravy, some chips (extra seasoning), and a revitalising 7up.
What a deal.
Chicken –16/20
A slightly mixed bag on the mall basement chook but when all’s said and done, a decidedly positive experience.
The two pieces under examination were a rib and a fillet in the burger. To start with the booby prize, the fillet was undersized. The runt of the upstairs litter. There was nothing wrong with it and the coating and crisping were tight but there wasn’t the juicy squeeze that you look for in an original fillet burger.
The rib is possibly the most technically challenging piece of KFC chicken to eat. For the beginners in the audience, it’s got a big old lump of white meat and then a series of sections where you need to snuffle out some tasty brown meat. When that’s done there are a series of skerricks of coating to pick off around the rib bones to finish it all off. If you’re novice you’ll just eat the white meat and dash, if you’re a dilettante eater, you’ll go for the brown too, but if you’re a true devotee the skerricks are the money. Anyway, no complaints with the meat here but the skerricks were too oily and a tasted a wee bit fishy. Not game changing, and still good chicken, but not the transcendence that I know to be possible. B+
Sides – 8/10
KFC East Garden followed up its strong showing in the chicken category with sides to be proud of.
The chips were cooked well, served hot, and salted to about the appropriate level for a standard serving. I had, however, requested extra seasoning which certainly wasn’t provided to marks are lost for that.
The potato and gravy had a nice taste, texture, and colour, and ultimately left little to be desired. I also, for the first time, saw the gravy being spooned into the containers at the back of the shop (more on this later) which was a nice little treat. I have to admit that I’d assumed that the potato and gravy arrived in restaurant pre-packed from a local gravy farm, so I was very happy to discover it to be an in restaurant artisanal product.
My gullet was kept lubricated by a 7up about which there’s little to say other than that it did its job.
Service – 7/10
My expectations of mall KFC service are low but have been limboed under plenty of times in the past. KFC East Garden surpassed my low expectation, using a scissor kick technique rather than the more emphatic Fosbury flop, but there wasn’t any reason for complaint. A little confusion, not outstanding enthusiasm, but thorough and effective.
Magic – 10/10
As I’ve already said, my expectations were low and plummeted further when I walked in and found myself in a puppy farm, but from the moment I reached the dark corner of the mall which KFC East Garden illuminates, the outlook brightened at every opportunity.
The first thing I saw was an employee sat in front of the counter having a feed on their break. When it comes to KFC the maxim ‘don’t get high on your own supply’ is absolutely unapplicable. There are few better signs for an outlet than the staff tucking in. You know there’s love in there.
Intriguingly, the layout of East Garden KFC is such that a large part of the behind the scenes action is visible to joe public. This is rare. Like I said, I saw the gravy being dolloped out for the first time, and I also saw for the first time someone tapping away at a PC inside of a KFC. What was going on? Minesweeper? Ordering more moist towelettes? Downloading hits off LimeWire? Who’s to say, all I know was that I was both intrigued and engrossed.
Behind the vale I also caught a glimpse of the Colonel Awards honours board at East Garden KFC and was pleased to see that Iona had been recognised with the coveted Pack Master award. Congratulations.
Finally, while I was eating, I witnessed a full blown domestic play out between the KFC and its neighbouring fish and chip shop. When was the last time that you saw that at a Guzman?
Full marks.
Mingin or Finger lickin?
Finger lickin 🙂
KFC Reviews 